How To Get A Gf In Middle School?


How To Get A Gf In Middle School
How to Get a Girlfriend in Middle School (with Pictures) Getting a girlfriend can be hard — especially in middle school. Many girls and guys go through rapid physical and emotional changes in middle school and are still on the way to figuring out who they are and what makes them happy.

  1. 1 Make her notice you. If you want to get a girlfriend in middle school, then the first thing you have to do is make her notice you. You won’t be able to make her your girlfriend if she has no idea who you are. To make her notice you, you should not only maintain clean clothes, good hygiene, and a killer smile, but you should find a way to make her see you — preferably when you’re at your best.
    • If you know that you’ll be running into her on a certain day, make sure to look your best.
    • Even if you’re in a bad mood, make an effort to smile and give her a positive vibe, so she wants to get to know you.
  2. 2 Have a great time. Invite her to hangout. Get to know her. Be upfront and friendly. It’s always about the other person in a relationship. When you hang out try to get to know her more. No one likes to get into a relationship with someone they don’t know.
    • She won’t be impressed if she sees you sleeping in class, or kicking your locker because it won’t open. You should make her see that it’s really fun to hang out with you.


  3. 3 Get her attention in class. You don’t have to be the teacher’s pet to get the girl’s attention in class. But you should do a few things to make her want to get to know you. Let her see you talking with friends before class starts so she knows you’re social. Pay attention and answer some questions correctly so she knows you’re smart. And don’t be rude to the teacher just to make her laugh.
    • You can make some jokes in class to show that you like to have fun, but not at the expense of others or the teacher. That’ll make her think that you’re too much of a wise guy.
    • If you make eye contact or walk into the room together, don’t be afraid to say hi.
    • If you’re sitting next to her, you can make small talk about whether she’s ready for the test, if she understood the homework, or just ask her how her day is going.
    • You can ask her to help you in class or have her tutor you. Just go up to her and say, ” Listen I’m having trouble in math and I was wondering if you could help me after school sometime?”.
  4. 4 Get her attention outside of class. You can also make a big impression on the girl if you run into her in the hall, the mall, or at a party. You don’t have to do a backflip to make her see that there’s something special about you. If you see her out in an unexpected place, don’t be shy and avoid her because you weren’t prepared to see her. Instead, go up to her and ask her how she’s doing.
    • If you see her in the hall, say hi and even walk next to her if you’re feeling bold.
    • If you see her at the mall or at a party, let her see you talking to your friends, acquaintances, and other girls to make her see that you’re a cool guy who can get along with anyone.
  5. 5 Be friendly. You may think that it’s not cool to be friendly, to smile, or to actually act like you care about the girl, but the opposite is true. She should be able to see your face light up when she comes your way, and to start to see that you may like her without feeling smothered or put off. So, if you see her, give her a big smile or a wave and ask her how she’s doing. Don’t be afraid that you don’t look cool just because you’re not ignoring her.
    • Remember that most guys in middle school are nervous about how to talk to girls. If you keep your cool and say hi to her like it’s no big deal, you’ll stand out from the pack.
  6. 6 Start a good conversation with her. Saying hi and making her see you having a great time is a great way to make her notice you, but when the time comes, you have to be able to put your money where your mouth is and to actually talk to the girl. She’ll be more likely to want to date you if she knows that you can actually hold up your end of a conversation and make her have fun and feel at ease. Here’s how to do it:
    • Start off by making her feel at ease. Pay attention to her and make eye contact without cornering her or making her nervous.
    • Ask her about whatever’s coming up next. If you see her in the halls, ask about her next class. If you see her in the halls, ask her if she’s going to a club meeting or what she’s up to after school without being too nosy.
    • Make her laugh. If you start off by poking fun at yourself or making a harmless joke about a teacher or someone you both know, you’ll start off on the right foot.
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  1. 1 Show an interest in her life. If you want the girl to feel like she means something to you, then you have to show an interest in her life. This doesn’t mean you should grill her and make her feel like you’re interrogating her, but it does mean that you should make her see that you care about her interests, her friends and family, and the things that are important to her. Here are some things to keep in mind:
    • Ask her about her dance classes or any sports she plays. Girls love talking about their interests.
    • Ask her about her pets. If she has a cat or a dog, she’ll love that you care.
    • Ask her about her friends. Girls love talking about their friends — and any drama that they may be dealing with.
    • Make sure that you have a balance. She should find out things about you, too, instead of revealing a lot without getting anything back.
  2. 2 Ask for her opinion. If you want the girl to see that she matters to you, then you should ask for her opinion on a variety of subjects to let her see that you care about what she thinks. You can flirt with her just by asking if she likes your new shoes or asking what she thinks you should do for your next haircut, but you can also ask her opinion on more serious matters.
    • If you had an interesting debate in a class you had together, you can talk to her after class to see what she thinks on the matter.
    • If you know that you both just saw a new movie, you can ask her if she liked it and why or why not.
    • Ask about her favorite music. See what she likes and doesn’t like to listen to – who knows, you may even end up going to a concert together.
  3. 3 Compliment her. If you want to make her feel special, then you should compliment both her appearance and her personality. You shouldn’t go over the top and say anything that makes her uncomfortable; for example, don’t say, “You are the most beautiful girl in the world,” instead, say, “Hey, I like your shirt. It matches your eyes perfectly.” Here are some other nice complements that can make her feel special without overwhelming her:
    • “I have so much fun talking to you.”
    • “You have a great laugh.”
    • “Has anyone ever told you that you look like.(name of cute actress here)?”
    • “It’s cool that you have time to do well in school and play soccer.”
  4. 4 Flirt with her. Once you’ve gotten to know each other a bit better, you can start flirting with the girl by teasing her, being playful, and let her see that you like her in cute and subtle ways. If you want to flirt with her, then you have to use your body language to let you know you care by facing her, making eye contact, and smiling at her, and to drop subtle hints that you like her.
    • Tease her a bit and let her tease you back. Don’t tease her about anything too serious that can be taken the wrong way. Instead, tease her about her love for the color purple or her obsession with any boy band.
    • You can break the touch barrier by playfully hitting her arm or letting her push you a bit if you’ve said something that makes her laugh.
  5. 5 Let her see that you’re paying attention. If you want the girl to start thinking that you want her to be your girlfriend, then you have to make her see that you actually pay attention to the things she says or does. If she gets a new haircut or wears a new outfit, let her know it looks great. If she told you on Friday that she was nervous about her weekend ballet recital, ask her how it went on Monday. It’s the little things that will make her see that you’re important to her.
    • If she once mentioned that Ryan Gosling is her favorite actor, you can mention that a new movie that he’s in is playing that weekend. She’ll be touched that you remember what she’s interested in – and may even want to go to the movie with you.
    • If you’ve been talking to her for a while and can tell that she’s not being her usual chipper self, you can casually say, “I can see that something’s wrong. Do you want to talk about it?” Even if she’s not ready to talk, she’ll appreciate that you care.
    • If you know she has a big test that she’s nervous about, wish her luck and ask her how it went afterwards. You don’t have to memorize her entire schedule to be aware of the key moments that matter to her.
  6. 6 Go out of your way for her. If you’re already flirting and getting to know each other, then you can start going out of your way for the girl to let her know she matters to you. You don’t have to make any grand gestures to make her see that you’re willing to do things for her and care about how she’s feeling. Here are some things that you can do:
    • If you know she’s really busy during lunch because she has to study for a test, offer to stand in line for lunch for her.
    • If you’ve started talking in the halls a lot, walk out of your way so you can escort her to her next class.
    • If your friends are waiting for you to catch up with them, don’t just leave her right away; talk until you find a natural stopping point in the conversation to show her that talking to her is important, even if it means making your friends wait for a minute or two.
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  1. 1 Make sure she likes you. Though there’s no guaranteed way to know if a girl likes you without asking, there are a number of signs that can let you know that she likes you as more than a friend. If you’re pretty sure she likes you or even just suspect that she likes you, then you’ll have much more confidence when you ask her to be your girlfriend. Here are some signs that she likes you:
    • If her face lights up every time you approach her and you can tell that she really likes talking to you.
    • If she’s always laughing or giggling when she talks to you, even if you’re not being that funny.
    • If her friends start giggling or abruptly stop talking when they pass you when she’s around.
    • When she’s dropped hints that it would be cool to have a boyfriend or has asked about your plans for the weekend, hoping you’ll invite her to something.
  2. 2 Find the right time and place. If you want to raise your chances of success when you ask her out, then you should try to ask her in the right time and place, when it’s most convenient for both of you. Pick a place where you two can be alone, or reasonably alone, so she has time to think and doesn’t feel pressure to report right back to her friends. Pick a time when she’s in a good mood and not stressed out about rushing off to her soccer game or to her next class.
    • You don’t have to worry too much about finding the perfect or even the most romantic place to ask her out. If you wait too long for everything to be just right, you may miss your chance.
    • Asking her in the hallways after school is a good idea as long as it doesn’t make her late for practice.
  3. 3 Let her know that you like her. You don’t have to tell her that she’s the most beautiful girl you’ve ever seen or that you can’t stop thinking about her, even if that’s what you’re feeling. Start small by telling her that you think she’s really cool and that you’ve enjoyed getting to know her. And if you have a lot in common, you can mention that, too. This shouldn’t take more than a minute. You don’t have to list every reason that you like her.
    • Say, “I just really wanted to tell you that” so she feels flattered and like you’ve put a lot of time into telling her how you feel.
    • This would also be a good time to gauge her reaction. If she leans closer to you, smiles or blushes, or even starts telling you that she feels the same way, then you can ask her out. If she backs away, says she has to go, or doesn’t respond well, then you may not want to upset her even more by asking her out.
  4. 4 Ask her out. Once you’ve told her how you feel about her, you should ask her to go out with you. In middle school, this usually is the same thing as asking her to be your girlfriend, so don’t be afraid to ask that. Look her in the eyes and ask her with confidence. Don’t look at the floor or mumble. You can even practice asking her out in the mirror if that makes you more comfortable.
    • Just a simple, “Do you want to go out with me?” will do the trick. She’ll appreciate that you’re being forward and direct.
  5. 5 React maturely. The last thing you have to do is to react maturely once you’ve asked the girl out. If she says yes and tells you that she likes you too, you should let her see how happy you are. You don’t have to jump up and down and celebrate, but don’t worry about looking too cool to really care – making her see how much she means to you will get your relationship off on the right foot.
    • Be prepared with a date idea if she does say that she wants to go out with you. You can ask her to go to the movies or to an upcoming dance. This will make her see that you’ve put a lot of thought into asking her out.
    • If she turns you down, don’t be mean or walk off without saying goodbye. Thank her for talking to her and tell her you hope she has a nice day. Even if she doesn’t want to go out with you, she’ll appreciate your maturity.
    • And whatever happens, remember not to take yourself or the relationship too seriously. Middle school is the perfect time for you to get some relationship experience without getting in over your head.
    • At some point before or during the date kiss her. But make sure both you and her are comfortable and in a good mood
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Advertisement This article was co-authored by, Eddy Baller is a Dating Coach and the Owner of a dating consulting and coaching service, Conquer and Win, based in Vancouver, Canada. Coaching since 2011, Eddy specializes in confidence building, advanced social skills, and relationships.

  • Co-authors: 348
  • Updated: January 3, 2023
  • Views: 1,653,485


Thanks to all authors for creating a page that has been read 1,653,485 times.

“I did almost all of these things and I now have been dating her for about 9 months and met her family yesterday and thought of this article! Thank you so much!”,”

: How to Get a Girlfriend in Middle School (with Pictures)
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Is it OK for middle school dating?

2. Establish ground rules – There is no hard rule for when tweens should be allowed to date. Keep in mind that even if you forbid young relationships and dating, your tween may still spend lots of time with a special someone at school. What’s more, forbidden fruit has a unique appeal.

Rather than a flat no, you might consider a more nuanced answer that includes “yes” to some scenarios (Okay, you can say you’re going out), “maybe” to others (I’ll consider whether you can go to a movie together, but if I say yes, I will be in the theater a few rows away), and “no” to others (You are too young to go to the movies without a chaperone and, by the way, you’re ).

You should also be talking about the or circumstance for different levels of physical contact. This is not for the faint of heart, but you can do it. Otherwise, how will your tween know what’s appropriate for a young relationship?
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How do I get girls in middle school?

Download Article Learn how to befriend girls and win your crush’s heart Download Article Getting girls in middle school can be challenging but if you are confident, humble, respectful, and willing to get to know her, she will be much more likely to see you as someone she wants to get to know more. Keep it simple when you ask a girl out. Avoid rejection by being courteous and following a few social tips.

  1. 1 Define your intentions. Do you want to have a serious girlfriend, several female friends you can hang out with, or is this your first time talking to a girl? It’s okay if you don’t know what you want as long as you remain respectful. Trying to get into a serious relationship is a lot different than just finding a girl to sit with at a cafeteria. Don’t put too much pressure on yourself.
    • Avoid following stereotypes that you see on tv or the movies. There is no set of rules to getting girls. Do what comes natural and treat every girl that you talk to the way you would want to be treated. If you get rejected, don’t lash out or talk behind her back. Learn from your experience and move on.
  2. 2 Shower and dress well. Some boys mature faster than others. If you play a lot of sports or sweat a lot, make sure that you start to wear deodorant. Always brush your teeth and style your hair before you go to school. Even if girls don’t say it to your face, they may still be forming an opinion about you. Put your best appearance forward.
    • Always keep up your appearance even if you’re not at school because someone might see you without you noticing. You don’t want to smell and look like a slob and have her best friend see you at the grocery store. You want every opportunity to look your best.
    • Make sure you have deodorant in your locker or in your bag especially if you are on a sports team or have phys ed.


  3. 3 Become friends. Hormones will develop differently for everyone but that doesn’t mean you can’t be respectful and get to know each other. Be careful that you don’t fall into the friend zone. Be friendly and say hi whenever you see her. Say her name and make sure she knows yours. Begin to ask her how her day is once you know each other’s names.
    • Pay attention to her and wave whenever you make eye contact. Don’t stalk her but always acknowledge her with a friendly smile. You just need to get noticed and establish that you are a good person.
  4. 4 Flirt with her a little. Stay out of the friend zone by flirting a bit. Have some light chit-chat and try to get her to laugh. Make sure to maintain eye contact but don’t stare. Compliment her. You can compliment her outfit or her smile while also teasing her a bit. Joke around and break the touch barrier.
    • Make small talk. You won’t ask her out the very first time you meet her so have some small talk and put both of you at ease. There will be a lot you have in common but if you don’t know where to start, ask about a class you share or what she thinks of lunch. Don’t look at the floor or dawdle. If you are too nervous or have nothing to say, a simple ‘hi’ and ‘how’s it going’ will do.
  5. 5 Find out what you have in common. Learn more about her every chance you get. Don’t make her feel like she’s being interviewed. Let your questions flow from the conversation. For example, if you’re at a pep rally you may ask if she likes sports.
  6. 6 Read her signs. There may be common signs that she’s interested in you including:
    • She pretends not to pay attention to you when you’re in a group. In contrast, she may only pay attention to you when you’re with other people.
    • She smiles when you get her attention. She may also blush.
    • Her friends may giggle when they see you together.
    • You get a certain feeling when you talk to her.
    • Other classmates tease you two about liking one another.
    • She seems to find a lot of reasons for trying to talk to you or be with you.
  7. 7 Find the right place and time. Choose a private place to ask her out. You also don’t want her to be distracted with school or things happening at home. If you are alone, she won’t feel pressured by friends teasing her. You don’t want her to be uncomfortable in any way. This includes being worried about an upcoming test.
    • Don’t wait too long. Don’t over think things. The right time may be when she is laughing with you after class.
  8. 8 Do something together. Find an activity that you both will enjoy together. Be prepared to have something in mind when you finally ask her out. Make sure she is comfortable doing the activity and it is something safe. For example, going to the movies or walking around the mall.
    • You may also ask her to go to the school dance or a school play, to walk her home after school, or to go to a birthday together. Don’t distract her by talking about upcoming tests.
  9. 9 Get the approval of her family and friends. There may be cultural reasons why she is hesitant to go out with you, but regardless of her cultural background, always be respectful and get the approval of her family and friends. This gives everyone security and lets them know that you are considerate and responsible.
    • Make sure to follow every requirement laid out by her family and friends. Bring her back earlier than her curfew and check in more than required. Choose a time and place that’s approved by everyone. Even offer to have a chaperone.
  10. 10 Be confident. Anxiety and being nervous is understandable, but if you’ve been genuine, respectful, and gotten to know her, you’ve got a good chance in getting her. Breathe slowly and keep your cool. You don’t want to act like someone you aren’t so just trust that she likes you for who you are.
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  1. 1 Keep things simple. Smile and be polite. You don’t have to make a grand gesture because it will make her feel uncomfortable especially if other people see. Come up with one or two sentences and wait for her response. Speak from the heart and look into her eyes.
    • Say something similar to “I really have fun with you and was wondering if we could hang out more?” or “We laugh all the time and I have such a great time hanging out. I was wondering if you’d go out with me?” Don’t stare at the floor or read from a paper.
  2. 2 React appropriately. Keep your emotions in check. If she says no, don’t get angry and yell or prod. If she says yes, embrace her, smile, and plan out your date. Let her see your enthusiasm but don’t go overboard to embarrass her.
    • If she says no, that isn’t the end of the world. Not only are there other girls you can meet but you also want to show her that you are mature. She may say no because she’s embarrassed and not ready to have a boyfriend yet. She may ask you out later.
    • Don’t damage anything or lash out at her if you get rejected. She is entitled to her feelings.
  3. 3 Ask her to dance. Middle school will often have several dances throughout the year. They are a great way to go out with her in a social setting as she expects to be asked out. This relieves any pressure. The vibe in a dance is more suited for you two to get to know each other as more than just friends.
    • It may be difficult to hang out with her amidst all your friends watching and wanting to hang out. Make sure to have at least one or two dances to be alone together or schedule a time for a walk to just talk.
  4. 4 Write a note. If you are very nervous and find it overwhelming to talk to her, you may write her a note to get your thoughts and feelings organized. Make sure you give it to her directly so she knows it’s from you and not a prank. Don’t give it to her during class or the teacher may make you read it out loud.
    • Don’t be nervous about rejection because you won’t see her reaction. You may ask her to respond with a note or a simple yes or no.
  5. 5 Talk to her friends. No one is closer than her friends. They will know how best to approach her. Be friendly to them and ask them how you should ask her. As a final attempt, you may ask them to ask her on your behalf.
    • You may also ask your own friends to ask her if they know her better or are more confident with you. Just make sure you rehearse what to say so that your friend is clear.
  6. 6 Call her. Face-to-face conversations may be difficult so pick up the phone and call her. You may also text her but sometimes it’s difficult to get the meaning across. Make sure you have an activity in mind before asking her out this way. You also have to get her number from her friends or directly from her so she’ll probably know why you’re contacting her.
  7. 7 Give her a gift. While you don’t have to give her something expensive, a thoughtful gift may put you in her good graces. You may give her a cool notebook, a fun pen, a CD, or candy or chocolates.
    • You may also place a note with your gifts so that she knows how you feel. Give the gift directly to her because if you give it to someone else, she may think it’s from her and not from you.
    • You may also try to give her her favourite treat. This shows that you have paid attention to her needs and want to make her happy.
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  1. 1 Avoid staring at her. She may get grossed out especially if she catches you constantly staring at her body. Always keep eye contact when you talk to her and don’t make her feel unpleasant or creeped out.
  2. 2 Don’t be clingy. You may come off as a stalker. It’s irritating to be everywhere she turns. Give her space and don’t constantly try to contact her. Be patient and confident that she will contact you because she likes you too.
  3. 3 Be humble. Don’t be arrogant or obnoxious. Avoid gloating about your life or trying to prove why you’re better than other people. Don’t put others down. Be yourself and respectful of others. However, you can tease her and be playful. She won’t want a pushover.
  4. 4 Ask her out when the time is right. Avoid putting off asking her out. She may feel that you’re not interested and move on. Let her know you have feelings for her as soon as you know. You may get frustrated as your feelings start to build and you have yet to do anything about it.
  5. 5 Find out if she likes you. Use your friends or ask her social circle if she has said anything about you. Depending on the size of your school, word may travel fast so make sure you ask her out as you get word from your friends.
  6. 6 Ask her out yourself. She may find it weird or creepy if you get someone else to ask her out. She may also think that you are too shy. You never know how she will interpret being asked by someone else especially if she doesn’t know that person.
  7. 7 Avoid going out with someone your friends don’t like. You may be a victim of relentless teasing and you may start to question your relationship. You also don’t want to lose friends or make her feel uncomfortable.
  8. 8 Hug in public. Don’t kiss in public because it may be against school rules. People may also see the two of you and may tell your parents. Kissing may be inappropriate at your age so play it safe and only kiss if it’s approved by her and both of your families.
    • Make sure you see each other enough and don’t constantly hug. It’s good to have a few classes together and hang out for a while during lunch or break.
  9. 9 Establish boundaries with your parents. Your parents may get nosey and make her feel uncomfortable. You also may need their advice so don’t completely cut them off from your relationship. They can be great support if you establish clear lines. You don’t want them interfering.
  10. 10 Keep track of relationship milestones. It will be embarrassing if you miss anniversaries. Keep in mind that the beginning of a relationship can be filled with times to celebrate. Some girls may want to celebrate every day or every week. be sure you know what she wants and enjoy your time with her.
    • Celebrate your firsts. For example, celebrate your first week together, first month together, and first class together.
  11. 11 Keep track of favorite movies, tv shows, music, and apps. She may get offended if you don’t share the same interests as her or put down what she likes. Have a few songs, shows, movies, or apps that you can enjoy together. Be careful how you use social media because rumors may quickly start if you post something questionable on your page or hers.
    • For example, if you change your relationship status on social media status, make sure she’s on board or she may get teased by friends when they see it.
  12. 12 Respect the social standings. It may be difficult to go out with a girl who is more popular than you so make sure you carry yourself correctly. Recognize how she acts with her circle of friends and ask what you can do to fit in. It’s okay if you think that changing yourself isn’t worth it.
    • Girls may be overly concerned by how others see them. Make sure you don’t ruin her reputation. Ask her what’s appropriate. Helping her enter another elite group can make her like you. For example, if you help her get into theater or cheerleading, she will see the value in your relationship.
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  • Make her feel important, just by complimenting her and talking to her when she’s lonely you will build a relationship with her. Don’t wait too long or she will expect that you just want to be friends.
  • Just be yourself and have confidence. Always be respectful of her and yourself.


  • Keep your hands to yourself. Making physical contact is inappropriate unless she wants a hug or to hold hands.
  • Don’t be cocky or arrogant.

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Is it normal to have a girlfriend in middle school?

Many adults remember having their first boyfriend or girlfriend in sixth, seventh, or eighth grade. Some consider it a normal step for kids entering adolescence — a rite of passage like acne or being embarrassed by your parents — but it may be time to reconsider.

  1. Turns out, puppy love may not be quite as harmless as it seems.
  2. According to research, dating in middle school is tied to poor study habits and even dropping out as well as behaviors such as drinking alcohol and doing drugs.
  3. Compared to adolescents who waited or dated early and then reversed their course in high school, early daters reported twice as much drug, tobacco, and alcohol use and dropped out of school at four times the rate.

Pamela Orpinas, a child development researcher at the University of Georgia, made this startling discovery over the course of a seven-year longitudinal study where she followed more than 600 kids in Georgia from sixth to twelfth grade.
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Is dating at 12 OK?

When should you start dating? Can 12 year olds date? If so, how can I convince my parents? By | March 20, 2012, 1:59 p.m. Category: when should you start dating?? can 12 yr olds date?? if yes, how to convince your parents?? There’s no one age when people “should” start dating — plenty of people don’t start until their late teens or after, and some people start earlier.

But dating when you’re 12 means something different than dating when you’re in high school or older. At 12, going out in groups is a lot more common — and can probably be a lot easier and more fun, too — than going out with just one other person on a DATE-date. If you want to go out with someone, try hanging out with a bunch of your mutual friends.

It’ll probably feel less nerve-wracking for both of you. Plus, chances are your parents will be more okay with the idea of you going out with a group than on a one-on-one date. And kudos to you for wanting to initiate the dating conversation with your parents.

  1. Let your parents know you’re thinking about dating — and maybe even that there’s someone you have a crush on and want to ask out.
  2. If they freak out, let them know you’re open to talking about rules and boundaries for this stuff — for instance, that you’ll always be hanging out with groups of other people, and you’ll always tell them honestly about where you’re going and who will be there.

Your parents might even have some helpful advice about dating. Tags:,,, : When should you start dating? Can 12 year olds date? If so, how can I convince my parents?
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What grade is it OK to start dating?

When Is Your Teen Ready to Date “Solo”? – Eventually, teens are ready to make the move and start going on what an adult would recognize as a date. Some pediatricians suggest that kids wait until they’re 16 to start this kind of one-on-one dating. That’s a good place to start the discussion, but every kid is different.
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Should I start dating at 13?

One-to-One Dating – At what age are children old enough to date “solo”? Not before they’re thirty-five. Preferably forty. Many of us feel that way when we imagine our son or daughter disappearing into the night arm in arm with a young lady or a young man.

As a general guideline, Dr. Eagar advises not allowing single dating before age sixteen. “There’s an enormous difference between a fourteen- or fifteen-year- old and a sixteen- or seventeen-year-old in terms of life experience,” he says. You might add or subtract a year depending on how mature and responsible your youngster is.

Community standards might be a consideration. Are other parents letting their teens date yet?
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Is it OK to have a girlfriend at 7?

Meet the experts: –

Kalley Hartman, LMFT, Clinical Director at Ocean Recovery in Newport Beach, CA Jephtha Tausig, PhD, Clinical Psychologist and Supervisor at Columbia University, Mount Sinai Medical Center, Adelphi University, and the Fairwinds Clinic.Jonathan W. Smith, LMFT at The Center for Family Wellness

PureWow: How early is too early for a child to have a boyfriend or girlfriend? KH: When it comes to whether a child is ready to have a boyfriend or girlfriend, parents should consider their child’s maturity rather than a particular age. Typically, it’s best for children under 13 not to engage in romantic relationships as they are still developing emotionally and cognitively.

Healthy friendships are encouraged for teenagers between 13 and 15, but romantic relationships could be too much for them to handle. Parents should discuss dating guidelines with their teens and monitor their behavior closely while providing support and guidance as needed. JT: It’s important to remember that our definitions of the terms “girlfriend” or “boyfriend” may mean something different to us as adults from what they mean to your child.

The way that young children, or older children, teens, and young adults define these terms changes over time as they evolve developmentally. So, this is where open communication with your child becomes very important. JS: First, I want to point out that this topic is very expressly separate from sexual behaviors, which should be discouraged until the child is developmentally able to comprehend the consequences and implications of that type of relationship and how to stay safe and maintain self-respect.

  • That said, the answer as to when a kid should be allowed to date is that it depends.
  • Children are not one size fits all and will all demonstrate varying levels of maturity and readiness for dating at differing ages.
  • PureWow: What if, for example, your 7-year-old comes home from school saying she got a new boyfriend and they kissed on the lips? KH: It is important to note that in the eyes of the child, there was probably nothing malicious or sexual about the kiss.

The terms “boyfriend” or “girlfriend” mean something much more innocent and less serious to the child than to teens or adults. However, it is important to recognize that a more serious conversation about respect, boundaries and consent should be had. Take this opportunity to teach your child about their bodily autonomy and how they can say no to any physical advances.

  1. Further, you must also teach them to respect other people’s physical boundaries as well.
  2. JT: It’s really about what your 7-year-old feels “a boyfriend” means.
  3. See if you can find out more from her about this in a genuinely curious, interested manner.
  4. What does she think having a boyfriend means and how does that work? (Very often at this stage, having a “boyfriend” or “girlfriend” could be something that lasts for a few hours or days at most).

As for kissing on the lips, you should certainly ask about that. (Why did they do that? Whose idea was it? Are they following behaviors that they have seen adults do? Is this something they were dared to do by peers?) It’s good to find out information first before providing a boundary for your child.

(This could be something along the lines of “you will have plenty of time to kiss someone on the lips later, right now you don’t need to do that.”) JS: A 7-year-old who is “dating” a classmate might believe it is dating just to declare that they are dating. At seven, a child who kisses another child on the lips is likely copying behavior modeled by television, parents, older siblings or other adults rather than acting on an internal drive for intimacy.

This child can be told about social rules and “time and place” rules society has about dating and affection. Children can be allowed to pretend to “date” without developmental harm, and any correction for kids who either intentionally or unintentionally go “too far” should be without shame and humiliation, and couched in terms of readiness, not appropriateness.

PureWow: What things should parents consider when determining whether or not their kid is old enough to date? KH: Parents should consider their child’s maturity and readiness. Ask yourself: Does your child understand what it means to be in a relationship? Do they know how to respect other people’s boundaries? Can they handle the emotional pressure of being in a relationship with another person? Can they maintain healthy boundaries in order to protect themselves from potential harm or exploitation? Ultimately, each situation must be evaluated on an individual basis, as every family and every child is different.

JT: It’s good to understand what is meant by “dating.” Is this a large-group or small-group or one-on-one activity? Who else will be present? What are the expectations you have, as well as those held by your child, their peer and their peer’s parents? It’s always helpful for everyone to be on the same page and comfortable with whatever the boundaries/limits are.
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At what age can a girl have a boyfriend?

Talking to your child – When your child mentions dating, or a girlfriend or boyfriend, try to get an idea of what those concepts mean to them. Take note of how your child reacts when you discuss dating. It could be a little uncomfortable or embarrassing, but if your child is unable to even discuss it with you without getting defensive or upset, take that as a sign that they probably aren’t ready.

Is your child really interested in someone in particular, or are they just trying to keep up with what friends are doing?Do you think your son or daughter would tell you if something went wrong?Is your child generally confident and happy?Does your child’s physical development match their emotional development?

Be aware that for many tweens and young teenagers, dating amounts to socializing in a group. While there may be interest between two in particular, it’s not double-dating so much as a group heading out or meeting up at the movies or the mall. This kind of group stuff is a safe and healthy way to interact with members of the opposite sex without the awkwardness that a one-on-one scenario can bring.

  • Think of it as dating with training wheels.
  • So, when is a child ready for one-on-one dating? There’s no right answer.
  • It’s important to consider your child as an individual.
  • Consider their emotional maturity and sense of responsibility.
  • For many kids, 16 seems to be an appropriate age, but it may be entirely suitable for a mature 15-year-old to go on a date, or to make your immature 16-year-old wait a year or two.

You can also consider what other parents are doing. Are lots of kids the same as yours already dating in the true sense of the word?
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How to kiss your middle school girlfriend?

Download Article Download Article Kissing your girlfriend is a gigantic step, especially if one or both of you are kissing someone for the first time. But this doesn’t mean you have to stress out about it! If you know how to get ready to make a move and respect your girlfriend’s boundaries, you’ll be on your way to an unforgettable kiss.

  1. 1 Get some privacy. Let’s face it. It may be hard to get complete privacy in middle school, but you have to do the best you can to make sure that you and your girlfriend can step away from your friends to get some time together. You could step outside during the school dance, find some solo time during a party, or even go out on a date together.
    • Avoid trying this in school for the first time. You’ve got to find a slightly more romantic location.
    • This doesn’t mean you should try to kiss your girlfriend the second you’re alone together. The moment has to feel right, and privacy isn’t the only requirement for that.
  2. 2 Freshen your breath. If you’re ready to kiss your girlfriend, then your breath better be ready, too. You don’t have to make dramatic gestures and eat ten breath mints, but you should brush your teeth if you know you’re going to see your girlfriend soon.
    • You can also put on some lip balm a few hours before to soften up your lips, but don’t use it right before you make a move or your lips won’t feel too pleasant.


  3. 3 Make her feel special. Once you’ve got her alone, you can’t just swoop in for the kiss or it will feel a bit forced. Instead, you have to show your girlfriend that you care about her by making her feel special. Give her a compliment, like, “You look so pretty tonight,” or say something nice like, “I’ve had so much fun with you today.” You don’t have to try too hard to show her that you really do care about her.
    • If you want to kiss your girlfriend, then she has to feel like you really like her for who she is, and that you see her as more than just a person to kiss.
  4. 4 Make sure she’s ready for a kiss. Before you kiss your girlfriend, you have to make sure that you’re on the same page. This is probably your first kiss, and it may be her first kiss, too, so you really want her to feel ready to make this move with you.
    • If she’s always trying to pull away when you’re alone together, and moves further and further away from you, then she may not be ready to take it to the next level with you. This doesn’t mean that she doesn’t like you, but it does mean that she’s not ready yet.
  5. 5 Make physical contact. You shouldn’t go from standing two feet apart from your girlfriend to planting a big wet one on her face, or she’ll be caught off guard. Instead, move closer to her and make some physical contact. If you’re sitting, you can sit closer to her, put your hand on her knee, or play with her hair.
    • This will also be a good time to see if she’s ready. Does she respond well to your touch, move closer to you, or even initiate some touching? If she’s not comfortable with physical touch, she’s probably not going to be interested in kissing, either.


  6. 6 Avoid the common kissing pitfalls. If you’re kissing your girlfriend in middle school for the first time, there are a few things you may want to avoid:
    • French kissing. This is not for everybody, and most people don’t start French kissing until high school. For your first kiss, keep the tongue out of it, or your girlfriend may be unpleasantly surprised. If you come out of the gate with a French kiss, it’ll be too much, too soon.
    • The roaming hands. Just because your girlfriend is ready for a kiss doesn’t mean she’s ready for you to start creeping all over her body. You can touch her in safe, PG areas to show her that you care, but you don’t want to creep her out by suddenly touching her in a place where she’s definitely not ready to be touched.
    • The sneak attack kiss. Avoid just jumping in and kissing her without any indication of what’s going to happen. Though some element of surprise is nice, you don’t want your girlfriend to not know what’s going on when you make your big move.
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  1. 1 Lean toward her until your faces are almost touching. Once you’ve made physical contact, all you have to do is move a bit closer to her until your faces are very close together. If you’re sitting, then you’ll both have to turn your bodies a bit. If you’re standing, you can put your arms around her waist and move closer to her.
    • You can lightly lick your lips a bit to soften them, if you’re not too obvious about it.
  2. 2 Tilt your head slightly. You don’t want to kiss your girlfriend head on, or your noses will get in the way. You should tilt your head slightly in one direction and she should tilt her head slightly in the other. Don’t worry if you don’t get it perfect the first time, or if you both don’t tilt your heads that much. This isn’t so crucial for a regular kiss, so don’t overthink it and tilt your head too much.
  3. 3 Kiss her. Here’s your big moment! Close your eyes, then just lean forward a bit and make the connection, touching your lips to hers. Your lips won’t align perfectly, and you don’t have to worry about it. Relax your lips instead of puckering them, and just gently kiss your girlfriend’s lips. You can hold the kiss for a few seconds, or for as long as you both like.
    • Try to match her throughout the kiss. You want to fit together like a puzzle, so it feels comfortable.
  4. 4 Caress her cheeks and hair. This is something you can do while you kiss your girlfriend, if you don’t think it requires too much coordination. Just lightly run your hand over her cheeks or her hair while you’re kissing her. This can be something you do during Round Two, if you go in for another kiss after the first kiss is over.
  5. 5 Use your hands (a little bit). While you’re kissing her, you can place your hands on her waist, her upper back, or her knee or shoulder if you’re sitting down. As long as you’re not touching her anywhere inappropriate, a little bit of touch can help the girl feel more in the moment. Don’t overwhelm her, though. If she’s not touching you except with her lips, only a bit of a light touch on your end will be enough.
  6. 6 Don’t forget to breathe. This sounds silly, but it’s important. You may be so nervous or excited about finally kissing your girlfriend that you may forget to perform one of the most basic functions of the human being. That means breathing in and out, just as you normally would, while you’re kissing her. If you only kiss for a few seconds, breathing before and after is OK too.
  7. 7 Slowly pull away. After a few seconds, you can slowly pull away, while continuing to look into your girlfriend’s eyes. Don’t instantly pull away like you’ve been scorched by a flame. Instead, look at her, smile, and gently move away. You can brush her face or hair for an extra touch.
  8. 8 End on a good note. Let’s face it. Middle school can be awkward. Kissing for the first time can be weird. But you should do the best you can to make your girl feel comfortable, and to say something like, “That was nice,” to let her know it was a special moment for you.
    • And hey, nobody’s stopping you from going in for that second kiss! If the first kiss went well, it’s okay to pull away and to go back for moreand more again!
    • Remember—practice makes perfect when it comes to kissing!
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Question What should you not do while kissing? Eddy Baller is a Dating Coach and the Owner of a dating consulting and coaching service, Conquer and Win, based in Vancouver, Canada. Coaching since 2011, Eddy specializes in confidence building, advanced social skills, and relationships. Conquer and Win helps men worldwide have the love lives they deserve. His work has been featured in The Art of Manliness, LifeHack, and POF among others. Dating Coach Expert Answer Don’t overpower your partner! Kisses should feel comfortable and strike a yin and yang type of balance. You don’t want to be doing anything that’s physically uncomfortable, like bumping into each other.

Ask a Question 200 characters left Include your email address to get a message when this question is answered. Submit Advertisement Thanks to all authors for creating a page that has been read 649,898 times.
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How does a girl feel when kissing?

– You can thank the many nerve endings in your lips for their part in making kissing feel so very good. Your lips have more nerve endings than any other part of your body. When you press them against another set of lips or even warm skin, it just feels good.
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How do u tell ur crush u like them?

Download Article Download Article You know it’s time to tell your crush how you really feel, but how do you do it? You may need to work up the courage to reveal your true feelings, but once you’re honest and open with your crush, you’ll feel better, no matter what happens. If you want to know how to tell your crush you like them without getting too nervous or making things weird, just follow these steps.

  1. 1 Don’t be disappointed if your crush doesn’t share your feelings, If they don’t feel the same way, it’s not the end of the world. You should feel proud that you had enough confidence to share your true feelings, and that you got the answers you were looking for, even if you didn’t end up getting what you wanted.
    • Remember that having the confidence to tell your crush how you feel will make you feel confident in your future relationships and choices.
  2. 2 Don’t be weird about seeing your crush if you know they don’t like you. If your crush doesn’t share your feelings, that’s okay. If you are friends, then maybe you should take it easy for a while, but that doesn’t mean you should run away or avoid them the next time you see them. Keep doing what you always do, and act happy to see your crush the next time you cross paths. Remember that your crush can’t help how they feel, and just play it cool. Advertisement
  3. 3 Celebrate if your crush does like you. If your crush returns your feelings, then you should enjoy your feelings of giddiness and excitement. Be proud of yourself for sharing how you feel, and have fun hanging out with your crush or even dating them, You can take things slow and decide what you want to do next. Your crush will be impressed by your boldness and honesty, and will want to hang out with you as soon as possible.
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  1. 1 Look your best without being too obvious about it. Sure, you should look good when you plan to tell your crush how you feel. Just don’t dress up to the nines if you normally rock a casual look, or put on a brand-new outfit if you’re always seen in cozy clothes. You don’t want your crush to think that you’re trying too hard to send them the right message. Just try looking a bit more dressed up and well groomed than you normally do – this will boost your confidence when you share your feelings.
  2. 2 Pick the right time and place to do it. If you want to get the best results, then you have to pick a time when you and your crush can be fairly alone in a stress-free environment. You may not want to do it between classes, when your crush may be caught off guard or worried about the math test they have to take next period. Instead, pick a time when you know you can be alone, like after school, or at a group event when you know you can pull them away to chat for a while.
  3. 3 Tell your crush that you want to talk about something. Don’t make a big deal about it – make it sound like you could be asking for help with your homework or something. Let your crush know that you wanted to talk about something in a one on one setting, but that there’s not a lot of pressure to have a serious conversation. The more casual you can be without making it sound too casual, the better. Just say, “Hey, I wanted to talk to you about something after school, do you have a minute?”
  4. 4 Make your crush feel comfortable by laughing or making a joke, You shouldn’t immediately spit out the words, “I like you!” because your crush may still be a little uncomfortable or confused about why you’re alone. Instead, put them at ease by making a silly joke, poking fun at yourself, or laughing extra hard at something they say. Laughing will put your crush in a positive frame of mind, and it’ll make them more receptive to whatever you want to say.
  5. 5 Spit it out. There’s no need to delay. Once you’re alone and have made your crush comfortable, you should just tell them how you feel. The sooner you do it, the better, and the less likely you’ll be to make yourself more nervous or likely to ramble on about something unrelated.
    • When you tell your crush, look them in the eye and relax your body. Don’t stand too close to them or look at the floor, or you’ll look either too eager or too withdrawn.
    • Use your crush’s name when you tell them how you feel. “Michael, there’s something I want to tell you.” sounds more personal than just saying, “I want to tell you something.”
    • Don’t build up to the thing you have to say too much. This will only put pressure on yourself.
  6. 6 Wait for a reaction. Don’t immediately put pressure on your crush and say, “So what do you think?” It’s likely that your crush is thrown off guard and needs some time to consider your words, whether they share your feelings or not. Take a few deep breaths, step back, and wait for your crush to respond. Your crush may immediately say that they return your feelings, but it’s more likely that your crush may need more time and will say, “Cool, thanks for telling me,” or “Can I have some time to think about it?” That’s perfectly natural. If you want to increase the chances of your crush liking you, you should play it cool after you put your cards on the table.
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  1. 1 Tell your crush how you feel over the phone. Though telling your crush in person will make you look more confident and mature, and saying it over the phone is sort of the worst way to do it, if you’re really shy about telling your crush how you feel, then calling them and revealing your feelings is the next best bet.
    • Talking over the phone will make you feel less nervous because you won’t see your crush face to face. Still, if you’re nervous, you can pace back and forth to get rid of some of that nervous energy.
    • If you’re determined to tell your crush how you feel over the phone, you can also practice by calling one of your friends and rehearsing what you’d say first.

    EXPERT TIP Joshua Pompey is a Relationship Expert with over 10 years of helping people navigate the online dating world. Joshua has run his own relationship consulting business since 2009 at a success rate of over 99%. His work has been featured in CNBC, Good Morning America, Wired, and Refinery29 and he has been referred to as the best online dater in the world. If you’re texting them after a date or get-together, don’t wait three days. Waiting three days to message someone doesn’t work anymore because everyone has their phones on them 24/7. Waiting too long can make you look bad to the other person. You need to find a balance between someone enjoying your texts and sending so many texts that the mystery and chase are gone.

  2. 2 Tell your crush how you feel with a cute note, Putting a cute note in your crush’s locker, textbook, or backpack that tells them that you like them can be a nice way to tell them how you really feel. Just write something like, ” Hi, Mark, I just wanted to tell you that I like you.
    • Be careful with notes – they can be lost or passed around, and you don’t want the wrong person to get the note!
  3. 3 Ask them on a casual date. If you’re too nervous about saying, “I like you,” you can sidestep the situation by just asking your crush to hang out. You can simply say you have extra tickets to a movie or a show and invite your crush along, ask your crush if they’re hungry or want to grab a snack or coffee somewhere, or ask if they want to go for a walk in the park. Asking them to hang out solo will make your feelings pretty obvious, so you can let your crush do more of the work when they figure it out.
  4. 4 Know what not to do. There are a few things you should avoid doing if you want to tell your crush that you like them and get the best results. Here are some things you should avoid if you want to look confident and mature:
    • Don’t have your friends tell them how you feel. If you want to look mature, you have to do it yourself.
    • Don’t do it over social media. This will make you look like you’re not serious or confident enough to have the conversation in person.
    • Don’t be too eager when you tell your crush how you feel. A simple “I like you” is far more effective and far less likely to scare them off than saying, “I’ve been in love with you since the second grade.”
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  • Question How do you hint to your crush? Joshua Pompey is a Relationship Expert with over 10 years of helping people navigate the online dating world. Joshua has run his own relationship consulting business since 2009 at a success rate of over 99%. His work has been featured in CNBC, Good Morning America, Wired, and Refinery29 and he has been referred to as the best online dater in the world. Relationship Expert Expert Answer You want to definitely be on the playful side as far as communication goes. Keep things right and friendly. Use the body language, some playful touches here and there, try to break away from being in the friend zone, and in subtle ways just communicate that there is potential on more of a romantic and physical level.
  • Question Should I tell my crush that I like them if I know they like me back? Do you want to date your crush? If you like your crush but aren’t interested in dating them, or can’t for whatever reason, they may be hurt or confused by getting mixed signals, so you probably shouldn’t tell them. On the other hand, if you’re interested in dating them, telling them can help you both figure out what you’d like your relationship to be.
  • Question My crush told me he was “done with girls” after a bad breakup a little bit ago. I want to tell him I like him, but I don’t know if he still feels that way and I don’t want to ruin our friendship. What do I do? If your crush is still recovering from the breakup, especially if the relationship was serious, telling him your feelings can make things awkward or make it seem like you were waiting for him and his girlfriend to break up. How recent was the breakup? Does he still seem angry or bitter about relationships, talk about his ex frequently, get annoyed or upset when he’s around her or someone brings her up in conversation, or say he’s not interested in dating when the subject is brought up? Depending on your ages and the intensity and longevity of the relationship, your crush may take awhile to get over the relationship and be willing to date again. Until you’re certain that he’s over his ex, you shouldn’t tell him about your feelings – wait until he’s over the breakup.

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  • Try to make friends with them first. If you are good friends and want to move to the next step, take it slowly; find the right place, time, day, make sure you’re in a good mood, and be relaxed when you talk to them. You will both feel more comfortable as well.
  • If you want to be romantic (or you’re not very good in awkward situations) try writing a love note. Put your feelings for them on it, then slip it in their locker or somewhere they will see it. It would also be cute to possibly “steal” a book or something of theirs playfully, and return it with the note inside, ready for them to “accidentally” find.
  • Make sure you like them, and aren’t going solely for their looks or because all your friends are dating someone already.

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  • If you get turned down by somebody, don’t immediately ask another person, especially a friend of that person you just got turned down by.
  • Don’t tell them your feelings in an inappropriate or sexual way. Flirting can work, but not this.
  • If you get turned down, it may seem hard, but you will get over them with plenty of help from family, friends, and the other small joys of living. It just takes time.

Advertisement Article Summary X If you want to tell your crush you like them, wait for a time when you’re alone together without distractions, like between classes or after school. Try to get them laughing before you make your move, so you’re both relaxed and in a good mood.

  • Then, look them in the eyes and tell them clearly that you like them.
  • For example, you can say something like, “I really like hanging out with you, and I want you to know that I have feelings for you.” This can be a lot to take in, so don’t be offended if they need a little time to think about their feelings.

For more tips, including how to tell your crush over the phone or with a cute letter, read on! Did this summary help you? Thanks to all authors for creating a page that has been read 1,845,709 times.
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Can a girl like you and not show it?

You probably have someone specific in mind if you’re asking, “How do I know if a girl likes me?” She seems to like having you around, and you want to know whether she likes you that way. It would sure help if you knew the signs she secretly likes you.

Maybe she’s not ready to tell you how she feels. But if you have feelings for her, and she’s showing the signs described in this post, you have reason to hope. Read on to learn more about these signs, as well as the reasons she may be hiding what she feels. No matter how inconspicuous she thinks she’s being, there are ways to tell if a girl is hiding she has a crush on you.

What you learn in this post isn’t about shaming her for that. She may have good reasons for keeping a lid on her feelings for you.

She’s already in a relationship and isn’t sure whom she wants to be with.She knows what she feels for you but doesn’t want you to know just yet.She’s ashamed of her feelings for you but can’t help showing them sometimes.She doesn’t know how you feel about her and isn’t ready to show her cards yet.

Knowing about her feelings can make it a lot easier for you to share yours. Knowing the truth can also help you decide whether to go for it or back off.
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How to get a girlfriend at 14 years?

Download Article Download Article When you’re a teenager, it can seem hard to get a girlfriend, especially if you’ve never had one before. Luckily, by projecting confidence, building a friendship with a girl, and being straightforward when you ask her out, you might just find yourself with a girlfriend before you know it!

  1. 1 Show her you’re self-assured by standing up straight and making eye contact. Even if you don’t feel super confident, you can seem like you do by practicing good posture and looking the girl in the eye when you talk to her. This will project assurance, sending the message that you are someone she should get to know.
    • Confidence is good, but being cocky will push girls away.
  2. 2 Smile when she’s around. The simple act of smiling can make you feel more at ease when you’re around the girl you like. In addition, it can actually make you happier. Smiling sends feel-good chemicals through your brain, relaxes your body, and lowers your heart rate.
    • Smiling also causes an unconscious in other people, making them more likely to smile.


  3. 3 Practice good hygiene every day. Girls are more likely to be attracted to someone who has a clean, well-kept appearance. Shower every day, keep your nails groomed, use deodorant or antiperspirant each day, and brush your teeth twice a day.
    • Good hygiene is important for more reasons than just getting a date. It can also promote good health throughout the course of your life.
    • If you like, spritz on a little perfume or cologne at when you’re getting dressed, but don’t go overboard with it, because it can be overwhelming.
  4. 4 Wear clothes that flatter you. You don’t have to wear the most expensive designer clothes to look good. Just wear clean, unwrinkled clothes that fit you comfortably and make you feel good about yourself.
    • Even if you don’t have a lot of money to go shopping, you can pick clothes from your closet that fit you well, then ask for clothes or gift cards for your birthday and holidays.
  5. 5 Find out if she likes girls if you’re a girl. If you’re a girl and you’re interested in a same-sex relationship, it can be hard to know how to find someone to date. If you’re not sure whether she’s gay, try asking mutual friends, pay attention to whether or not she flirts with you, or just ask her.
    • For a subtle way to ask her if she likes girls, try saying something like, “So, do you have a boyfriend?”
    • Signs that she’s flirting with you might include seeming really excited whenever you’re around, finding excuses to touch you or be near you, or smiling whenever she looks at you. However, these could also mean she sees you as a dear friend, so take your time to be sure before you make a move.
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  1. 1 Introduce yourself if you don’t already know the girl. This will show her that you’re confident and that you are interested in her. It might seem a little scary to be the first one to break the ice, but take a few deep breaths and remember that you have to talk to her if she’s ever going to be your girlfriend.
    • Try asking her a question or for a small favor as a way of striking up a conversation. For instance, if you’re in class, you could say something like, “Hi, I’m Jess. Do you have a pencil I can borrow?”
  2. 2 Make small talk, Once you’ve introduced yourself, try to work your way into a light-hearted conversation. Ask her a question, talk about school, or chat about something that’s going on around you. The conversation doesn’t have to go on too long, but it will let her know you noticed her.
    • Stay away from serious topics like politics, religion, or anything too sad, at least at first.
  3. 3 Make her laugh. If you can make a girl laugh, she’ll be more likely to want to spend time around you. Try telling jokes, make fun of yourself (but not too much), and find plenty of reasons to laugh a lot yourself.
    • When you get to know her better, send her funny texts or memes to make her laugh.
    • If something funny happens around the two of you, turn it into an inside joke and make references to it at unexpected times.
  4. 4 Ask her questions about herself. Over time, as you’re talking to the girl you like, ask her questions that will help you get to know her better, Ask her about her friends, her pets, what kind of music she likes, or anything else you’re curious about. As you’re talking, tell her things about yourself too. Just don’t monopolize the conversation by talking about yourself the whole time.
    • Try asking her a question like, “How do you spend your time on the weekend?” to find out what she likes to do when she’s not at school.
    • You could also ask her something like, “What’s your favorite class?”
  5. 5 Listen to her when she’s talking. Show her that you’re paying attention by nodding and giving her feedback while she talks, like “Wow!” or “I didn’t know that.” Try to see things from her point of view, which will make you more engaged in the conversation. In addition, showing empathy can make you more likely to get a girlfriend.
    • Listening to what she has to say is the best way to find out if you and she are compatible.
    • It will also show that you are interested in what she thinks, which she’ll appreciate.
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  1. 1 Spend time around her. There’s no need to rush directly into asking her out. Play it cool and hang out together for awhile to develop a strong friendship. In addition to giving you a chance to get to know her better, she will also get to know you, giving her the chance to decide if she likes you.
    • If you go to school together, try to hang out between classes or at lunch.
    • Outside of school, try to hang out as part of a group so it will be low-key and relaxed.
  2. 2 Do things she wants to do. While inviting her to hang out with you doing the things you like can be fun, it’s important that she gets to pick what you guys do sometimes too. This will show her that you’re versatile, that you respect her as an equal, and that you value her relationships.
    • For instance, if she meets up with you and your friends for a pizza night, take her up on the offer if she invites you to go with her and her friends to the movies.
  3. 3 Don’t pretend to be someone you’re not. You’re unique, and if you want a girlfriend, she should appreciate you for exactly who you are. Focus on your talents and what makes you special, and let her get to know the real you.
    • If you pretend to be someone else and the girl you like finds out, she probably won’t trust you, and she may not want to take the time to find out who you really are.
    • It can be hard to be vulnerable around someone else, but take your time and slowly open up to her. She’ll most likely appreciate getting to see a different side of you.
  4. 4 Give her thoughtful compliments, You don’t want to overdo this, since it especially during the friendship phase, but if you notice something you really like about her, let her know. It might be a good grade she got on a test, a dress that makes her look especially pretty, or a new haircut.
    • You could also compliment some of her character traits, like how she’s always nice, even to the unpopular kids.
    • Avoid complimenting her body, as this could make her feel uncomfortable.
  5. 5 Flirt with her. It’s important to build a genuine friendship with the girl you like, but if you want to know if she might be interested in dating you, try flirting with her. Make eye contact with her when you’re talking, look for excuses to brush your hand against hers, and keep your arms uncrossed and your posture relaxed when she’s around to show your interest.
    • The more you get to know her, the more obvious your flirtation can be.
    • Give her some space if she doesn’t seem to be open to your flirtations. For instance, if she shows signs that she doesn’t want to be touched, back off physically so you don’t make her uncomfortable.
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  1. 1 Look for clues that she’s interested, As you’re flirting with the girl you like, pay attention to how she reacts. If she seems receptive to your attention, like blushing or smiling at you when you compliment her, she might be interested. If she rolls her eyes or doesn’t seem like she enjoys being around you, you should probably find someone else to spend time around.
    • Touch her arm, hand, or shoulder, and see how she reacts. If she pulls away, she might feel uncomfortable. However, if she leaves your hand where it is, she may be interested.
    • If she does pull away from you, respect her physical space and don’t try to touch her again unless you’re sure she wants you to.
  2. 2 Choose the right time to ask her out. The best time to ask a girl out is when the two of you are alone in a quiet place with few distractions. This way, she’ll be able to really focus on what you’re saying.
    • If she’s feeling stressed out or distracted, or if there are a lot of other people around, wait for a better time.
  3. 3 Ask her to be your girlfriend. Exactly how and when you do this is up to you, but it’s best to be straightforward. Try looking into her eyes and thinking about what really makes her special to you. Then, tell her that, and ask her if she’d like to be your girlfriend.
    • Don’t assume she’ll know what you mean. Be clear about what you’re asking.
    • You may want to ask her on a date before you ask her to be your girlfriend, or you may even want to go on several dates first. On the other hand, you might choose to ask her to be your girlfriend first, and then take her on a date. Do what feels most natural to you.
  4. 4 Set up the time for a special date if she says yes. You may want to have a few ideas for a date planned ahead of time, so if she says yes, you’ll be ready with a suggestion. Think about what she likes to do, and plan your date around that.
    • Even if you don’t have a lot of money, you can still plan a memorable date that she’ll love.
    • For example, if she really likes romantic gestures, ask her if she’d like to go on a picnic in the park.
    • Other options might be to cook dinner for her, go to a football game together, or attend a dance she’s been looking forward to.
  5. 5 Respect her opinion if she says no. Unfortunately, even if you do everything right, there’s no guarantee that someone else will be interested in dating you. Rejection can be really hard to deal with, but try to accept it gracefully.
    • If she says no, try to say something like, “I understand, it’s okay. I’ll see you at lunch tomorrow,” even if you’re feeling really upset. That way she knows she doesn’t have to feel uncomfortable around you.
    • Just because this girl wasn’t the one doesn’t mean you’re unlovable. Keep looking, and you’ll find the right person for you.
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Ask a Question 200 characters left Include your email address to get a message when this question is answered. Submit Advertisement Article Summary X If you’re a teen and you want to get a girlfriend, try to find a girl who has common interests with you, since you’ll always have something to talk about.
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How to get a girlfriend in 5th grade?

How to Get a Girl to Like You in Fifth Grade: 12 Steps

  1. 1 Be friendship-minded and easy-paced. Girls don’t like guys who spend all their time on getting a girl, they might suspect a “player” rather than good friendship material. Also, don’t be whiny or a crybaby because girls don’t want to be friends with people who just sit around and whine.
  2. 2 Be funny. Humor is an attractive trait for any person and it helps ease tension and awkwardness. It can also reassure a girl that you’re not being overly confident and self-inflated. Advertisement
  3. 3 Be yourself. Don’t try to be sporty, geeky, hipster, etc. if you’re not. On the other hand, be as much of the person you really are so that she accepts you as yourself. Always be polite though––just because you like gross humor or practical jokes doesn’t mean she deserves to be on the receiving end of those. Use your common sense––making friends requires holding back on being silly, rude or just plain dumb.
  4. 4 Respect the worries and concerns the girl likely has. She is no different from you in worrying about being rejected, ignored or made fun of. Reassure her that you don’t intend to do any of that to her and she’ll be glad to spend time with you.
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  1. 1 Choose a girl who knows you just a little already. It is almost impossible to get a girl to like you when you’re not in her homeroom. Try someone who is in your homeroom, to make things easier.
  2. 2 Ask to hang out with her at recess, or sit with her at lunch and bring up a conversation. It’s always best to be friends first, and after you take it slow, then you can tell her you like her, or ask her out if both of you are allowed to date or not.
    • You can show a genuine interest in the things the girl likes. Try to find out more about those things.
    • Then incorporate them within a date or in your grand gesture.
    • It will show her that you pay attention to what she says and prioritize it because you know it will make her happy.
  3. 3 Walk home with her. Ask her where she lives and walk home with her. She will like the company.
  4. 4 Try emailing her or giving her a phone call. She will probably appreciate the fact that you would like to know her better.
  5. 5 Try to get her friends to like you too. If her friends have a negative opinion of you, she might think it’s true. It’s best to get to know her friends as well. If she does not have friends, be her friend.
  6. 6 Let her feel comfortable around you. She will grow to consider you a safe person to be around and will want to be friends with you.
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  1. 1 Make sure she’s the right one before deciding to become romantic with her. Realize that at your age, friendship is more realistic and that if you are romantic together, it most likely won’t last and you might lose her friendship for good if that happens.
  2. 2 Don’t jump into kissing. You guys have only known each other this way for less than a year. Give yourselves some time before you kiss, if at all. This part really isn’t necessary and you might prefer just being good, solid friends.
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Advertisement Co-authored by: Licensed Clinical Psychologist & Professional Life Coach This article was co-authored by, Dr. Susan Pazak is a Licensed Clinical Psychologist & Professional Life Coach. With more than 21 years of experience, she specializes in treating adolescents and adults with psychological issues using cognitive behavioral therapy, symptom reduction skills, and behavior modification techniques.

  • She has been featured in numerous media outlets and shows, including “My Strange Addiction”. Dr.
  • Pazak holds a BA in Psychology with a minor in Communications from The University of Pittsburgh, an MA in Clinical Psychology from Pepperdine University, and a PhD in Clinical Psychology from Alliant International University.

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  • Co-authors: 71
  • Updated: March 22, 2023
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“I think it should help me. I don’t know yet. She is amazingly cute but the thing is I am in 4th and she is in fifth. And she is taken but I still like her.”,”

: How to Get a Girl to Like You in Fifth Grade: 12 Steps
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